Do you remember the tale of the Battle of Thermopylae? Not the horribly shot Gerard Butler vehicle, but the real life version where a small force of Greeks got wiped off the face of the Earth by an overwhelming Persian army? That’s this series, in which a juggernaut Blue Jays team (115 wRC+) descends upon Turner Field where the pathetic Barves make a stand to either A. Play spoiler for the Jays in the AL East or B. Not embarrass themselves too horribly. One thing is certain: Zack Snyder won’t be making a film about this 2015 team. Though if he did, it might be more watchable than the team is.
There’s just so little to enjoy in this team, despite being Fun Too Watch. They are the owners of the worst team wRC+ in the league, 16% worse than league average. They are last in the league in dingers, and trail the next closest team, the Marlins, by 15 big flies. Meanwhile, in Canada, the Rogers Centre has become a launching pad, with Joey Bats, Edwin Encarnacion, and the Jays pacing the league with 202 homers–more than double Atlanta’s season total.
If the Braves have a chance, it’s because Toronto’s pitching has been lackluster all year, ranking 18th in the league in FIP with a 4.10 mark. Of course the Braves, not content to rest on their laurels, seem fine with being bad at everything, as their 4.39 FIP ranks 27th in the league, and the early season bullpen woes have been forgotten. Not because they’ve been remedied, but because a young, inexperienced cohort of starters has joined them in free fall. Julio Teheran – Mark Buehrle should be an interesting match up in game one that should favor Atlanta, but if you have any doubt about how bad these rotations have been, consider that neither team has officially listed their game two and three starters yet.
If you like good baseball, consider watching the Jays. But not this series. You’ll be forced to watch bad Braves baseball–the antithesis of everything Alex Anthopoulos has built in Toronto–as well as listen to some questionable commentary. Find something else to do. Read this blog. Go for a walk. Go build some barrels. Maybe even log off. Just don’t watch this series. If history has taught us anything, it’ll be a massacre.